The Usual Choices
Empire of the Sun (Steven Spielberg)
Full Metal Jacket (Stanley Kubrick)
House of Games (David Mamet)
The Last Emperor (Bernardo Bertolucci)
The Princess Bride (Rob Reiner)
But how about...
84 Charing Cross Road (David Jones)
A gentle film about small lives, the love of books and penpal-ship. A probable snoozefest for normal, red-blooded people, I love this movie for its fragility and total lack of cynicism regarding the human condition. Spanning 1949 to 1968, it tells the story (well...nearly a story) of a New York war-widow who loves classic literature and corresponds with an English old-books seller to help her track down rare editions. That's all there is...a close friendship is formed via mail with the woman, the bookseller, his family and the employees at his London shop. I strongly dislike the to-camera monologues (always feels phony) and Anne Bancroft does her grating-Bronx thing, but the film remains a warming hand-on-hand look at loneliness and affection and decency.
...and what about...
Radio Days (Woody Allen)
A big, hefty wallow in nostalgia...and so what? A collection of the thinnest of vignettes, Radio Days is Woody's breathe-a-sigh reminiscences of his 1940's New York childhood. As with the best stories, Truth is, at best, a leaping-off point, so this is devoid of that dry-documentary feel...you are doing more than just looking at recreated home movies. Subtle, with a longing for the good ol' days and an amnesia for the horrors of WWII and the Great Depression, this movie is full of great pop songs of the era, gorgeous costume & art design, and a celebration of radio as it once was: the common man's portal into the great, wide world. A few laughs, some sex, some tears, sudden tragedy, regret and loneliness...it's still a Woody film, but it's just a little warmer than the others.
...not to mention...
Hope and Glory (John Boorman)
The years of the London Blitz as seen through the eyes of a 10 year old boy. As a memoir of the director (he also narrates), it is impossible to escape nostalgia and the inclination to tell the story in simplified slices. Still, it is an engaging shared-experience and sentimentality is largely bypassed. Some of the images are quite affecting (the loose blimp; the gangs of scavengers no older than 12) and if more of the horrors of carpet bombing had been shown, the feeling of the movie would have obviously been more dour. Apart from Ian Bannen overdoing his feisty Grandpa routine and the young actress playing Dawn hitting one shrieking note and staying there throughout, the actors effectively serve the material. Nice.
...and one personal unmentionable...
The Princess Bride (Rob Reiner)
What does anybody see in this thing?? Nothing in this seems to work: not the Neverending Story / Shrek isms; not the fight sequences (the fencing is woeful...compare it to anything by Errol Flynn or Douglas Fairbanks and snort); not the humour (a pair of Noo Yawk Jewish trolls...really?); not the special comedic guest stars (isn't Peter Cook just doing a Monty Python "welease Bwian" wipoff?); not the acting by the leads (all right...maybe Mandy Patinkin); not the twinkling Grandpa with the sick-in-bed boy cut-ins; not the SFX (the tussle with the giant rat recalls Johnny Weissmuller wrestling with stuffed crocodiles & geriatric lions); and not the soundtrack music which must have been piped in from some nearby elevator. Now tell me...how can this possibly be a much beloved film?
My Top 10 Films of 1987
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| Viagra nasal spray was short-lived. |
#02 A- Hope and Glory (Boorman)
#03 A- Broadcast News (Brooks)
#04 A- Matewan (Sayles)
#05 A- Nadine (Benton)
#06 A- Raising Arizona (Coen)
#07 A- Radio Days (Allen)
#08 A- House of Games (Mamet)
#09 A- The Untouchables (De Palma)
#10 B+ I've Heard the Mermaids Singing (Rozema)
Overflow: More A-/B+ Films
#11 B+ Empire of the Sun (Spielberg)
#12 B+ Wish You Were Here (Leland)
#13 B+ Robocop (Verhoeven)
#14 B+ Shy People (Konchalovsky)
#15 B+ Hamburger Hill (Irvin)
#16 B+ Withnail & I (Robinson)
#17 B+ The Dead (Huston)
#18 B+ The Lonely Passion of Judith Hearne (Clayton)
#19 B+ The Stepfather (Ruben)
#20 B+ Good Morning, Vietnam (Levinson)
Sorry, They Didn't Make It...
> B Moonstruck [geez...there's not much to it, is there?]
> B The Last Emperor [ever so grand]
> B Planes, Trains & Automobiles [good comedy partnership which is deserving of a script with more substance]
> B Ironweed [a character study of two unappealing characters]
> B Street Smart [thunders on a bit but it's a pleasure to watch Morgan Freeman be an evil bastard]
> B Wall Street [movie featuring Trump's pin-up boy slams home the cautionary tale a little too hard]
> B Roxanne [a good-hearted rom-com which takes a step too close to sappiness]
> B La Bamba [three classic songs and a good lead performance and that's pretty much it]
> B Prick Up Your Ears [good acting...dingy story]
> B Bagdad Cafe [quirky for quirky's sake]
> B Throw Momma From the Train [dark comedy which has its moments but not enough of them]
> B Fatal Attraction [more unpleasant than scary]
> B- The Whales of August [for people who choose to think that old age is sweet and sad]
> B- The Believers [more very unpleasant than scary]
> B- The Living Daylights [James Bond played by an actor with no apparent sense of playful humour whatsoever]
> B- Lethal Weapon [aka The Three Stooges Minus One]
> B- Cry Freedom [should be about the courage of Steve Biko; is about a white guy named Donald]
> B- Nuts [I keep expecting Babs to break out into "people...people who need people..."]
> B- Kangaroo [historically and politically interesting at times but probably only if you're an Aussie]
> C Angel Heart [more extremely unpleasant than scary]
> C The Princess Bride [A Personal Unmentionable]
> C Full Metal Jacket [two bookends with nothing between them]
> C The Witches of Eastwick [a slobbering & salacious Jack would be tricky for any director to rein in]
> C The Glass Menagerie [features one wonderful performance when it needs to feature three]
> D The Lost Boys [the director who gave Batman a nipple-suit gives Duran Duran fangs]
> D Spaceballs [profoundly unfunny]
> E Superman IV: The Quest for Peace [everybody responsible for this should be ashamed of themselves]
> E Five Corners [the RSPCA Homicide Squad needs to investigate this film]
"Ah!..Sweet Mystery of Life...": 1987 Films I Apparently Still Need to See
Barfly (Schroeder); The Bedroom Window (Hanson); Blind Date (Edwards); Dead of Winter (Penn); The Fourth Protocol (Mackenzie); Hollywood Shuffle (Townsend); Housekeeping (Forsyth); Innerspace (Dante); The Lighthorsemen (Wincer); Little Dorrit (Edzard); Near Dark (Bigelow); Siesta (Lambert); Someone to Watch Over Me (Scott); Square Dance (Petrie); Stakeout (Badham); Starlight Hotel (Pillsbury); Stormy Monday (Figgis); Tin Men (Levinson); Travelling North (Schultz); White of the Eye (Cammell); The Year My Voice Broke (Duigan)
Best Performances of 1987
Cher in Moonstruck
Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction
Sean Connery in The Untouchables
Michael Douglas in Wall Street
Holly Hunter in Broadcast News
Joe Mantegna in House of Games
Jack Nicholson in Ironweed
Meryl Streep in Ironweed
But how about...
Nicolas Cage in Raising Arizona
I have never been much of a Nicolas fan...he's just too erratic and weird to be a viable dramatic actor (Leaving Las Vegas; Birdy) or action hero (Ghost Rider; Con-Air). But he is a very good dry, comedic performer as he showed in Matchstick Men, Adaptation, Guarding Tess and, best of all, Raising Arizona. Framed in the storytelling razzle-dazzle of the Coen Brothers, Nicolas portrays a habitual criminal who now just wants to do the right thing by the woman he loves. This involves stealing a baby for her, working at a shit job, socialising with her shit friends, turning away his escapee ex-cellmates in their time of need and denying his love of robbery. Facial slapstick, white trash accent, intellectual simplicity and permanently startled hair are all features of this beautifully centred (and central) comic performance.
...and what about...
Richard E. Grant & Paul McGann in Withnail & I
If I was a betting man, I would wager that the cult which surrounds this movie also adores the Brit TV shows The Young Ones and Black Books and the movies Trainspotting and Bedazzled...all based around complete tossers and losers. But all pale in comparison to Richard & Paul in Withnail & I, the two biggest inept wastrels that have ever graced celluloid. Richard is alcoholic, cowardly, bone-idle and incapable of telling the truth; Paul is watery-weak, homophobic to the point of terror, easily deluded and prone to fleeing. Together, they deserve each other and the two actors produce a comic tour-de-force...they make two pathetic creatures amusing, rather than merely annoying. Laugh along and be contemptuous at the same time.
P.S. Why wasn't Richard E. Grant ever made a Doctor Who??
...not to mention...
Morgan Freeman in Street Smart
I wonder how many psycho-creep-bastards Morgan Freeman has played in his career. I bet it's not many...and after seeing this, I am thankful. What a monster. Not in the Hannibal Lecter / Leatherface kinda way...more like the somethin'-about-him guy who you see walking towards you down the street and you instinctively cross the road to get to the safety of the other side...and then he crosses over too. When this violent pimp gives one of his women a choice of which eye she would prefer him to cut out, you know he is gonna do it. Truly frightening stuff, and an impressive dark turn from the man who was tapped to play Nelson Mandella, the President of the USA and God.
...and one personal unmentionable...
Rick Rossovich in Roxanne
Ever been to a party where there is obviously someone who doesn't fit in? They laugh too hard, too loud and too long; they say what they think they are supposed to say and then desperately scan faces for approval; they just don't get the joke, and nobody wants to explain it to them. In Roxanne, Rick is this misfit. Steve does his wild crazy guy bit and Daryl does her melt-your-heart nice girl bit, and Rick tries to be the called-for nerd but he is outclassed by the company he keeps: Clark Kent played by a ventriloquist-less dummy (why would someone as gorgeous and smart as Daryl be even vaguely interested in him?) Yes, the role is that of a vacuous man, but we still need him to bring SOMETHING to the party. Doesn't happen.
My 10 Favourite Performances of 1987
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| When cotton buds just aren't enough. |
#02 Nicolas Cage in Raising Arizona
#03 Morgan Freeman in Street Smart
#04 Kim Basinger in Nadine
#05 Richard E. Grant & Paul McGann in Withnail & I
#06 Joe Mantegna in House of Games
#07 Christian Bale in Empire of the Sun
#08 Maggie Smith in The Lonely Passion of Judith Hearne
#09 Sheila McCarthy in I've Heard the Mermaids Singing
#10 Denzel Washington in Cry Freedom
Overflow: More List-Worthy Performances
#11 Chris Cooper in Matewan
#12 Emily Lloyd in Wish You Were Here
#13 Barbara Hershey in Shy People
#14 Karen Allen in The Glass Menagerie
#15 Terry O'Quinn in The Stepfather
#16 Albert Brooks in Broadcast News
#17 Lou Diamond Phillips in La Bamba
#18 John Lone in The Last Emperor
#19 Anne Ramsey in Throw Momma From the Train
#20 Steve Martin & John Candy in Planes, Trains & Automobiles
#21 R. Lee Ermey in Full Metal Jacket
#22 Sean Connery in The Untouchables
Sorry, They Didn't Make It...
> Michael Douglas in Wall Street [he's just not as good as his dad, is he?]
> Jack Nicholson & Meryl Streep in Ironweed [roles which any competent actor would shine in]
> Robin Williams in Good Morning Vietnam [not acting; just his hilarious & breathless stand-up routine]
> Cher in Moonstruck [she serves the material, but the material is pretty thin]
> Olympia Dukakis in Moonstruck [overdoes the Italian Mama routine]
> Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction [some friends once tried to fix me up with this woman]
And so...onto the annual awards (with a nod of appreciation to Danny Peary)...
The Alternate Oscars for 1987 are:
FILM of the YEAR
GOLD: 84 Charing Cross Road (David Hugh Jones)
SILVER: Hope and Glory (John Boorman)
BRONZE: Broadcast News (James L. Brooks)
LEAD ACTOR: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Nicolas Cage (Raising Arizona)
SILVER: Joe Mantegna (House of Games)
BRONZE: Chris Cooper (Matewan)
LEAD ACTRESS: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Holly Hunter (Broadcast News)
SILVER: Kim Basinger (Nadine)
BRONZE: Maggie Smith (The Lonely Passion of Judith Hearne)
SUPPORTING ACTOR: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Morgan Freeman (Street Smart)
SILVER: Denzel Washington (Cry Freedom)
BRONZE: R. Lee Ermey (Full Metal Jacket)
SUPPORTING ACTRESS: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Karen Allen (The Glass Menagerie)
SILVER: Anne Ramsey (Throw Momma From the Train)
BRONZE: Mia Farrow (Radio Days)
ENSEMBLE or PARTNERSHIP: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Richard E. Grant & Paul McGann (Withnail & I)
SILVER: Steve Martin & John Candy (Planes, Trains & Automobiles)
BRONZE: Bette Davis & Lillian Gish (The Whales of August)
JUVENILE: PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
GOLD: Christian Bale (Empire of the Sun)
SILVER: Sebastian Rice-Edwards (Hope and Glory)
BRONZE: Martha Plimpton (Shy People)
The Alternate Razzies for 1987 are:
CRAP FILM of the YEAR
Five Corners (Tony Bill)
CRAP MALE PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
Rick Rossovich (Roxanne)
CRAP FEMALE PERFORMANCE of the YEAR
Joan Rivers (Spaceballs)
